"I have been dreaming almost every night about being in England, about seeing friends and family and doing those things I used to do. I am comfortable. I am content.
I awake neither of those things, I awake disconnected, almost mournful"
I have spent much of my time thinking and praying about what "Home" is. For many years I would say Nottingham, England; that's my home. My family is there, my culture is there and many places and people I love are there.
This is the place I truly belong.
However I am coming up for 2 years now in the USA and I have those things here too. None has replaced what I have in England but are new additions in my heart. And as I walked down the aisle on October 3rd 2009 I felt a great sense of love, I was surrounded by family- The Caton's, YWAM and many other new friends who had rallied around us and I remember distinctly saying to myself "Finally the USA feels like home".
How I long for both; even for 3. Boston is my home, Indiana is fast becoming my home too and then there is Nottingham and as this battle waged in my mind, guilt filled my mind for ever having thinking to call anywhere else home but England God spoke to me:
"Home is here with me, everywhere else is temporary"
How true and yet how profoundly simple; this world is not and has never been my home! Although my heart yearns for these worldly places, it is really yearning for my real "Home", with my father and my Lord. And wherever I go God is with me and who knows where the Lord will take John and I, who knows how many "Homes" we shall have in this world?
There will always be ties, be loved ones, be treasured memories and I allow myself to miss such things and become excited to see them again but I shall not dwell on earthly places anymore- I will simply travel wherever the Lord takes me and wherever he wills our next "home".
This song has spoken to me so much about this; I hope it inspires you too:
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